Originally I set out to write a narrative of what it is like in the head of… well what it is like in my head during any kind of social situation or in a classroom setting.  Unfortunately, I found that turning the multitude of thoughts and distractions that can run through my thoughts almost simultaneously into a dialog was not the most effective way to describe the way distractions occur for me. Rather I will attempt to explain to my best ability how when in these situations I cope with the distractions. The problem is most individuals when speaking of distractions are referring to the distraction in a singular sense.  From my experience with ADHD I am not distracted by one single thing. For that to happen it would require me to focus on that sole object which I find difficult to do already.  I would argue that because of my ADHD I am in a constant state of distraction.  In certain situations this state of mind can be detrimental, but in others the heightened level of awareness of what is happening in my surroundings is useful.  The state of distraction is something that I am using to describe my ADHD so I will try and explain it as best I can.

The first step to understanding the state of distraction is that one has to understand what the prompts and thought processes my mind goes through that cause these distractions.  The prompts are simple. Anything and everything can distract me from the grain in the wood on the table to a bird slamming into the window.  They do scale differently, but it also depends how in depth into a distraction I am.  For example, I have been known to ignore a bird running into a window because I was so distracted by other things such as the wood of a table.  That may seem like focusing, but I would still consider it a distraction because of the degree of focus that is being exhibited on this table.  Staying on the table idea, if one was to get my attention and ask me to describe the table I would be hard pressed to give more then a basic overview of its appearance.  That is because I am not really focusing on the table I am more looking at it not thinking about it, this is were there is more depth to the distractions and where I would say just because I appear to be distracted by one thing that is not the case.  In fact I may have been thinking about the wood of the table, the shining of the light of the metal legs of the chair, if the teacher is sick because his voice is gravelly, if the sweet smell in the air is some girl’s perfume, and … you get the idea.  This exchange of ideas (distractions) happens in about a second. They snap through my mind so quick I can barely recognize what they are.  As one might imagine sometime these sensations can become overwhelming. When this happens normally it causes me to stop being productive and become moody.  Throughout the years I have gained the skills necessary to cope and avoid these melt downs, but it is still can become overwhelming at times.  When in a class situation especially where one is expected to focus and listen to the teacher it can become especially hard to manage.  To me even when I am in a class the teacher is just another distraction, but that is the one that I need to be distracted by.

In the state of distraction there are two kinds of distractions; productive distractions, and unneeded distractions.  There is no way to filter one kind of distraction and often times I can not help to stop myself from wondering where that scratch on the desk came from.  What I have found though over the years is that if one knows they are going to become distracted then they need to set themselves up in a situation where they can go from an unneeded distraction to a productive one, my whole entire learning process is based around this strategy.  If I get distracted from the teacher in class which happens, I have to be able to set myself up in a way that lets me get distracted again by the teacher so a portion of my attention can be redirected to the teacher.  An unfortunate byproduct of this state is that my attention will with out a doubt be divided.  This can be a challenge to my learning. Sometimes however it helps me when the teacher engages me in the topic. When that happens my attention will redirect fully to the teacher.  This is good. I am now focusing fully on the teacher, but it does not mean that I am focusing on the right part of the teacher.  Ideally I should be paying attention to what the teacher and I are speaking about, even now though I can still find myself distracted by the teachers clothes, voice, motions, and facial expressions.  Being aware of this as a teacher should be important, not only the fact that if I am paying attention to you that I can be distracted from what your saying if you make a weird face or if your tie and shirt do not match.  This can also be a tool to have me redirect my attention when I am not on task, by making a motion with your arms to demonstrate your point can often cause me to focus on that motion and once you have that part of my attention it is much simpler for me to refocus on what you are saying.

The key to understanding what I am saying, is understanding that the number of distractions that can happen in a mere second is well above two or three.  Sometimes I experience distractions so rapidly that I find it impossible to describe exactly what distracted me.  It is very difficult to explain in words, but every sound and every motion that happens around me I give conscious thought to with out meaning to.  In overwhelming situations with lots of noise, and motion I can often become anxious and frustrated.  This is because I lack the basic control over, what things that are happening around me that I think about.  My mind is constantly full of thoughts. When I was younger it could be overwhelming and still can be, but I have gained a much better handle on dealing with a mind that is full of distractions.

The state of distraction, a state in which one’s mind is constantly looking for a new object to subject to its interests.  To the best of my ability I have described how I experience the world.  Whether one disagrees with this scientifically, or personally this is how I experience the world through my eyes and mind, flitting from one group of distractions to another, constantly changing, never lingering on one thing for too long.